I am so lonely but by choice

Dear Qur’an,

I have finally come to the conclusion that I do not like my roommate. It is little things that get on my nerves, but it’s a lot of them. I can’t see myself living with anyone else though. How should I move forward living with them?

  Sincerely, Roommate Rage

Dear Roommate Rage,

To be honest with you RR, if there are not any other accommodations to finding substitute living arrangements this late in the year, then you may have to stick it out. 

So, the only other option is to never be in your room. Today is the day to get a social life and make some friends since you would rather be anywhere but in your dorm.

Making friends within the classroom allows you to see the same faces, study names and get acquainted with people throughout the entire semester. Are you more intrigued by the student who stays in the back or the one who raises their hand for every question?

 Getting involved on campus was not my top priority when I got to college, but somehow it found its way to me. But, in your case I would run to get involved, anything to occupy your time and to not be in your room. Go somewhere else to study. I found it the most distracting to study in my room (without a roommate) because I tend to be the most distracted in my own space rather than going to the library or the cafe. 

In a previous advice piece, I mentioned the author Henry Rollins and his famous line, “sometimes the truth hurts,” and it is going to hurt you both when the truth reveals you are both probably terrible people (just kidding). In all honesty, this is an awkward conversation to have with anyone, but a much needed conversation nonetheless. It is better to be transparent with your roommate (as if you guys are not transparent enough.) You both have opened up another side to each of you that the typical stranger would not. Easier said than done of course, but if the beef is existent then inform your roommate of your room accommodations from here forward.  

My last piece of advice is to mind your own business. The power of ignoring can keep you out of a lot of trouble. If you do not mind being more social, only use your dorm for sleeping, but if you are a normal human being who likes being alone in the comfort of their own space, you better act like your roommate does not exist. Being friends with your roommate is not required for a successful college career, so do not get hung up about not liking your roommate, it is more common than you think. 

Lonely and Love it,


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